Sui CynosureAfter posting a lot of bad news today, I decided to give my last post for the night a positive note. A while ago, I found this blog called “Cynosure“, run by a female blogger named Sui, who is in recovery from an eating disorder. The blog is full of inspirational messages and thoughts, as well as personal posts about her life and journey. I found this post, probably at random one day while surfing for articles, and I always felt that it was something I wanted to share. Here are Sui’s own words on self-love, acceptance and compassion:

Loving yourself isn’t just about feeling good in YOUR body. Loving yourself isn’t just about being yourself & accepting yourself. Loving yourself isn’t just about looking in the mirror and being able to smile at yourself each morning. Loving yourself isn’t just a feeling. Loving yourself is a commitment. Loving yourself is respecting yourself enough to do what’s best for yourself, even if it might not seem to satisfy your first impulses. Loving yourself is showing up & saying yes. Loving yourself is forcing yourself to get out of the house when you realize you’re wallowing in self-pity or depression. Loving yourself is accepting that invitation from your close friend whom you’ve been blowing off because you’ve been hiding from the world. Loving yourself is doing your work first, before checking your email, instead of playing games or watching TV… so you won’t be up depriving yourself of sleep at the very last second before a deadline. Loving yourself is sleeping at a time early enough that you will be well-rested tomorrow morning. Every single night. Loving yourself is waking up early enough to give yourself time to have a moment in the morning, have time to dress yourself in clothes that make you feel confident, and nourish your body with a breakfast filled with foods you love. Loving yourself is realizing that drowning in a box of cookies is not the answer to an empty feeling in your heart. Loving yourself is breathing deeply and asking yourself first why you feel this way, and being there, being present for yourself. Loving yourself is calling a friend or taking a walk instead of indulging in an addiction to go numb. Loving yourself is realizing that binge drinking, eating, or anything else will and does hurt you, no matter what comfort it may seem to bring for a moment. Loving yourself is refusing to use words to bring yourself down. Loving yourself is refusing to deny your own awesomeness. Loving yourself is refusing to insult or otherwise demean yourself. Loving yourself is accepting the compliments & having convenient hearing loss when someone is being vicious. Loving yourself is using kind words, to yourself & others. Loving yourself is recognizing your own unique nature & being happy with it, & recognizing the unique nature of others & being happy that they are them. Loving yourself has nothing to do with jealousy or envy. Loving yourself is being grateful for what you have, knowing that more of the good stuff is to come, & knowing that every individual has hir own struggles & successes. Loving yourself is refusing to let your self-worth be dictated by any external comments or numbers. Loving yourself is realizing that failing your finals or losing your job does not make you a failure. (In fact, people can’t be failures.) Loving yourself is choosing to focus on the thoughts & feelings that make you feel good, and refusing to get caught up in thinking about things that bring you down. Loving yourself is daydreaming about what excites you, & visualizing your reality. Loving yourself is absolute gratitude for everything in your life, past & present, knowing that whatever happened to you in the past is exactly what you needed then, and that whatever you have now is exactly what you need now. Loving yourself is prioritizing your health, making sure you always have healthy foods available, doing what it takes for you to be comfortable, happy, & healthy in your body. Loving yourself is realizing that the world is full of infinite abundance, yours for the taking. Loving yourself is realizing that you are more than your body– that you are much, much more than anything you ever dreamed of. Loving yourself is taking care of errands and little issues like renewing your driver’s license right away instead of putting it off and letting them ferment into big, pesky problems. Loving yourself is realizing that the moments in your life are precious & irreplaceable and that if you are giving up those moments to a job or a field that does not satisfy you, loving yourself is liberating yourself from your employment and doing something else. Loving yourself is believing in yourself, taking a chance, going for what you love. Loving yourself is only purchasing clothes that you will wear, & only wearing clothes that fit you wonderfully & make you feel spectacular. Loving yourself is dressing up on the days you feel most like throwing on an old shirt and oversized pants. Loving yourself is taking time for yourself every day to hone your hobbies, do something fun & enriching, and prioritizing yourself. Loving yourself is being honest and vulnerable to others, knowing that you are strong & worthy of love no matter what you could reveal about yourself to someone else. Loving yourself is eating only what you are excited to eat, not settling for something just because it’s there, and eating when your body needs sustenance. Loving yourself is enjoying your food & eating mindfully, paying attention to what you put into your precious body. Loving yourself is honoring your hunger. Loving yourself is being your OWN best friend and your OWN lover and your OWN family when you find yourself in a moment (or month or two) without any external assistance. Loving yourself is enjoying your time alone, doing something that makes your heart sing. Loving yourself is honoring your commitments to YOURSELF and others. Loving yourself is doing everything you can possible to do the best for yourself. And loving yourself is forgiveness, is moving on, is letting go of yesterday’s seeming mistakes and seeing them as lessons. Loving yourself is growing & changing & learning. Loving yourself is hanging on when things get tough, & continuing to make the choice to do what’s best for yourself, day after day, even when it seems CRAZYdifficult. Loving yourself is refusing to settle. Loving yourself is saying no to what is unimportant to you. Loving yourself is letting go of friends or family who don’t treat you wonderfully. Loving yourself is sprinting your way out of any relationship that makes you feel threatened, unsafe, lowered, unworthy, controlled… Loving yourself is knowing that you are worthy. Worthy of living passionately, worthy of enjoying your life, worthy of focusing on what excites you, worthy of letting go of anything that holds you down, worthy of doing whatever is necessary for you to be healthy & thriving, worthy of the very best. Loving yourself is knowing that you deserve better, and taking the actions necessary to have the life you deserve. What does loving yourself mean to you?

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